Diplomacy, Trump-style: insult allies, praise dictators, and conduct foreign policy like a contestant on The Apprentice. From love letters with Kim Jong-un to suggesting that NATO members should pay protection money like they’re dealing with a mob boss, Trump’s approach to global relations was nothing short of revolutionary—in the sense that it often left world leaders wondering whether they were on a prank show. Whether cosying up to Putin, attempting to buy Greenland, or abandoning allies via Twitter, his geopolitical strategy boiled down to one simple rule: flatter him, and you’re in. Question him, and you’re dead to him.
—Folks, nobody was better at foreign policy than me—NOBODY! World leaders, they all respected me—Putin, Xi, Kim, they loved me! NATO? They were ripping us off—but I made them pay up, BIGLY. Ukraine? Would’ve never happened if I was in charge. Middle East? We had peace, folks, TOTAL PEACE! But now? Chaos. Weakness. Embarrassment! Now, it’s gonna be America First, America STRONG, and the world? They’re gonna BEG for me to take charge again!
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